Tuesdays with Morrie
by Mitch Albom. NY: Bantom Doubleday, 1997.

See that sculpture of me? A friend of mine sculpted that maybe thirty years ago. His name was Norman. We used to spend so much time together. We went swimming. We took rides to New York. He had me over to his house in Cambridge, and he sculpted that bust of me down in his basement. It took several weeks, but he really wanted to get it right.

Here's the sad part of the story. Norman and his wife moved away to Chicago. A little while later, my wife had to have a pretty serious operation. Norman and his wife never got in touch with us, never called to see how she was. We were very hurt so we dropped the relationship. Over the years I met Norman a few times and he always tried to reconcile, but I didn't accept it. I wasn't satisfied with his explanation. I was prideful. I shrugged him off.

A few years ago, he died of cancer. I feel so sad. I never got to see him. I never got to forgive. It pains me now so much? (Morrie began to cry a soft and quiet cry lying in his bed with his tears rolling off his face before they reached his lips.

It's not just other people we need to forgive. We also need to forgive ourselves. For all the things we didn't do. All the things we should have done. You can't get stuck on the regrets of what should have happened. That doesn't help you when you get to where I am.

Make peace, you need to make peace with yourself and everyone around you.

Forgive yourself. Forgive others. Don't wait. Not everyone gets the time I'm getting. Not everyone is as lucky.

 Vengeance or Building a Nation?

I thought I'd share a story from our last visit in South Africa. We were going to the airport in a van driven by John, a wonderful man who had taken us on several outings. We were on the way to the airport and John pointed out a vacant lot where, he told us, a prison stood that he had once been in. He said it was so terrible there that, the week after liberation and the election, the people tore it down brick by brick.

Ralph said: "John, how is it that you don't want to kill all of us whites after what you went through? How can you be so forgiving?"

John said: "Madiba (their name for Mandela) told us that we could go for vengeance or we could build a nation, but we could not do both. So we decided to build a nation."

WOW, eh???? The power of forgiveness in that country is a beacon for the world.

From: Jane Magruder Watkins
Appreciative Inquiry Unlimited

 Recovery from a Wrist Injury

A woman I met at the 2005 Spirit in Leadership Conference held in North Carolina by the Center for Creative Leadership told me this story. In her late 20’s she often swam for exercise and stress management. One evening she was swimming at the Y where she was doing laps in her own lane. It was busy with the after-work crowd. Someone in the lane next to her was using hard hand paddles and accidentally hit her wrist while passing. It hurt and she had to quit for the night. The young man that hit her did not even know it had happened. She did not know him, and never told him.

Over the years, her wrist was weak and she had to use the stronger wrist for lifting heavy articles. When she would get massages, she always told the massage therapist not to work near that wrist because it still hurt after 15 years. After telling the story to a new massage therapist, he asked her, “ Have you forgiven him?”

Instantly she knew she must do this and in her heart she felt a release as she recalled the event with a forgiving attitude. From that moment, she has never felt pain in her wrist again.